Deflated, a feeling and a poem

Today I found myself feeling very much deflated as I was getting ready for work. There were multiple reasons why I was feeling that way and quite frankly I just wanted to stay home in bed! As I was trying to finish up my morning routine before jumping in the shower I saw my stack of journals sitting on the shelf and decided to pick up one to just take a quick look inside. I'm not sure why, maybe to wallow a little bit more or possibly to find a little inspiration? With my writings it could go either way. So I pick up the top journal, open it up, and the place I land on is the page where I wrote a poem back in 2007 called "Deflated"! I kid you not! It's so weird how the wavelengths of the Universe line up sometimes! Maybe someone else needs to read this today and not feel alone? I'm with you friends, feel free to leave comments if you can relate.

Deflated

I feel like a deflated balloon trying to float.
No strings attached
if you can help me find my way?
I'm forced to fly through the air,
bouncing off the fingers of my peers,
but with no direction
and a lot less air.
Sometimes I'm afraid
but I don't tell anyone.
I figure there has to be a way to float
without a hand intervening?
As sure as hell is hot,
my low point is coming!
Inhale!
Exhale!
Inhale!
Exhale!
Inflate...
Inflate myself with mantras of worth,
affirmations from fairies
I keep in a box
with reminders of words I knew when I was well.
Inhale!
Exhale!
Inhale!
Exhale!
Inflate...
Inflate those around me so we all see eye to eye
even through adversity
so no one falls away.
All inflated equally!
Today I'm the one feeling deflated
just like a balloon
but a good friend told me it will pass
and I believe him...
no strings attached.

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Harboring regret

Treading the Election and Life

Tuesday, November 8, 2016 I sat on the couch Election Night feeling more anxiety than I had ever known. I didn’t want to believe what was happening but there it was right before my eyes, the electoral map, on my local NBC channel looking like someone wrapped it in red Christmas paper. I tried to stay hopeful and kept repeating in my head "Hillary, Hillary, Hillary". I managed a quick nap around midnight, holding out hope that Lovey would wake me up and say “She did it, Hillary is President!” but it never happened. I woke up about 15 minutes later and it ended up that I was the one nudging her awake around 1am/1:30 saying “let’s go to bed, it’s not looking good” just after they called Florida to the other side. So we frumped our way upstairs to bed where I lay wide awake for a long time with my mind all a whir. The next day I was feeling very disappointed so I limited my social media browsing and did not watch the news except to see Hillary’s speech, which made me cry.

"Lifted" the video and poem dedicated to Sisterhood

I wrote this poem after spending an hour with a few of my female artistic friends. We discussed poetry, art, life, and when I got home I felt this overwhelming feeling of inspiration and joy! Yes! Joy! It's like we all shared our energy while we were together. I just had to write my feelings down. The words came out of me so easily thinking of my own Sisters and the friends I consider to be Sisters from other Misters. I wrote the poem in one sitting and a few weeks later I got the idea to record my voice reading it and create a video using photos. I put a call out on my facebook feed and asked female friends to send me photos of themselves with their Sisters or with their BFFs that they considered Sisters or with women they were inspired by. The ladies sent me some great images and I used a bunch of my own for fill ins to create this video. This is definitely one of those labor of love or labor of inspiration times. Please watch and share! Words are posted below.

Words and Pieces

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