Sometimes I have that thing they call a "monkey brain". Its when you have all these thoughts in your head and you can't concentrate on just one thing. It's not productive at all! A few months back I had been really just living on auto-pilot from day to day. I was going through the motions and allowing my brain to live it's crazy monkey existence and not caring all too much until one day I realized I needed to pull my head out of my ass! I wasn't happy and I wanted to bring back what was not going on in my life, like creating art, or laughter or hanging out with family & friends! Important things were missing! One day on the walk to the train I decided that I would make an attempt to actually stay in the moment to tame that monkey brain. So as an exercise I would recite things that I saw around me. The first morning I tried reciting into my iPhone but I found that the spell check gizmo made too many errors. The next day I just tried plain ole' memory! I would recite in my head as I passed something, like curb, street light, yellow yield sign, and then when I got to work I'd write them all down, well at least the things I could remember! After a couple of days doing this I started to feel better! The exercise of recognizing the road I was on really did help dislodge my head! I was able to stay in the moment, take some deep breaths and as a bonus it gave me some material to write this piece below. Now what worked for me might not work for you but the reality is probably the same. Don't just let life pass you by while you remain in a stupor my friends! Do something just a little out of the ordinary, make an attempt, write in your journal, turn up the music and sing as loud as you can! Go forth and really see what makes up the world you live in, even if it's not pretty it is still part of your journey and all that is important is that you keep moving forward.
It's morning
and I am once again
doing the ten minutes late asphalt shuffle!
I'm stepping all over the cracks
without any regard
for my mother's back right now.
I'm hopping over sticky gum,
cruising the sidewalk,
head down, and both legs moving quickly
with feet in comfy boots.
Quickly, quickly, quickly!
I pass the corner bodega.
The smell of coffee wafts out.
One cup for a dollar fifty inside.
No time for that!
I look both ways
before crossing,
attempt a slight jog
to hurry across the road.
I think I increased my heart rate
for three seconds?
Ok, maybe one calorie burned?
When I get to the other side
I mentally try to stay in the moment.
No time for daydreaming today.
Ten minutes behind the clock,
I could walk this beat with my eyes closed.
I'm already on auto-pilot
on these familiar streets.
The same signs bolted on poles.
Eighteen steps to the curb,
four more blocks and then
take a left down the alley.
A group of teen girls ahead,
causes me to slow down.
They are really loud!
Their laughing and talking
booming in the air
as they saunter down the sidewalk
on their way to school.
Was I like that as a teen?
The bright morning sun
creates a comical shadow of me
that mimics my every step.
I wonder if I really look that fat?
I'm amused for one minute.
Red stop sign,
yellow traffic light,
Oh! Look at all the tiny alcohol bottles
empty and abandoned at the curb!
The sound of plastic hitting pavement
perks up my ears and I look to the left to see
a cup in the wind, a rhythmic... pat...tap...pat...tap
as it tumbles across the urban landscape.
Flattened, red coke cans
in the road, squooshed after
being run over by a car or two.
So many tiny Ziploc bags strewn about,
their contents already smoked, snorted or injected.
Green one there, pink one there, clear one there.
This is the familiar litter of some of the city's dwellers.
It adds color to the plain blacktop of the streets.
Walking by the busy bus stop,
I pass people's vehicles parallel parked between meters,
25 cents for 20 minutes, put a coin in the slot
or a fifty dollar ticket awaits you upon your return!
I notice the maroon, broken bricks next to Doctor's office,
weeds sprouting from the base of the wall.
"They should fix that," I think to myself!
It seems like there are cabs honking everywhere!
A cop is standing on the corner busy
talking on his mobile phone.
He can't be bothered to direct traffic at this time.
In front of me, pedestrians hurrying to the train station
walk through the puddles left from the rain overnight.
Their shoes ripple the reflection of the
green fire escape I always admire.
It's attached to the five-story apartment building
next to the big parking lot.
They charge $20 for 8 hours.
I become one with the crowd
heading towards the terminal.
People filing on to the escalators
towards the train platform.
Ahead of me two people are standing
side by side talking and blocking
my ability to descend!
In my head, I recite
the common law rule,
"the left lane is for passing my friends!"
Then I look and see the train waiting below.
Thank goodness the doors are open
and it's not so crowded yet.
I am going to make it! Yes!
A sigh escapes my mouth
as I enter the train car
and plop into the blue plastic seat.
Ahhh!
It's a small victory making the train...I'll take it!
 |
| Baldwin and Hopkins, The Heights, Jersey City |
It's morning
and I am once again
doing the ten minutes late asphalt shuffle!
I'm stepping all over the cracks
without any regard
for my mother's back right now.
I'm hopping over sticky gum,
cruising the sidewalk,
head down, and both legs moving quickly
with feet in comfy boots.
Quickly, quickly, quickly!
I pass the corner bodega.
The smell of coffee wafts out.
One cup for a dollar fifty inside.
No time for that!
I look both ways
before crossing,
attempt a slight jog
to hurry across the road.
I think I increased my heart rate
for three seconds?
Ok, maybe one calorie burned?
When I get to the other side
I mentally try to stay in the moment.
No time for daydreaming today.
Ten minutes behind the clock,
I could walk this beat with my eyes closed.
I'm already on auto-pilot
on these familiar streets.
The same signs bolted on poles.
Eighteen steps to the curb,
four more blocks and then
take a left down the alley.
A group of teen girls ahead,
causes me to slow down.
They are really loud!
Their laughing and talking
booming in the air
as they saunter down the sidewalk
on their way to school.
Was I like that as a teen?
The bright morning sun
creates a comical shadow of me
that mimics my every step.
I wonder if I really look that fat?
I'm amused for one minute.
Red stop sign,
yellow traffic light,
Oh! Look at all the tiny alcohol bottles
empty and abandoned at the curb!
The sound of plastic hitting pavement
perks up my ears and I look to the left to see
a cup in the wind, a rhythmic... pat...tap...pat...tap
as it tumbles across the urban landscape.
Flattened, red coke cans
in the road, squooshed after
being run over by a car or two.
So many tiny Ziploc bags strewn about,
their contents already smoked, snorted or injected.
Green one there, pink one there, clear one there.
This is the familiar litter of some of the city's dwellers.
It adds color to the plain blacktop of the streets.
Walking by the busy bus stop,
I pass people's vehicles parallel parked between meters,
25 cents for 20 minutes, put a coin in the slot
or a fifty dollar ticket awaits you upon your return!
I notice the maroon, broken bricks next to Doctor's office,
weeds sprouting from the base of the wall.
"They should fix that," I think to myself!
It seems like there are cabs honking everywhere!
A cop is standing on the corner busy
talking on his mobile phone.
He can't be bothered to direct traffic at this time.
In front of me, pedestrians hurrying to the train station
walk through the puddles left from the rain overnight.
Their shoes ripple the reflection of the
green fire escape I always admire.
It's attached to the five-story apartment building
next to the big parking lot.
They charge $20 for 8 hours.
I become one with the crowd
heading towards the terminal.
People filing on to the escalators
towards the train platform.
Ahead of me two people are standing
side by side talking and blocking
my ability to descend!
In my head, I recite
the common law rule,
"the left lane is for passing my friends!"
Then I look and see the train waiting below.
Thank goodness the doors are open
and it's not so crowded yet.
I am going to make it! Yes!
A sigh escapes my mouth
as I enter the train car
and plop into the blue plastic seat.
Ahhh!
It's a small victory making the train...I'll take it!
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