Words and Pieces

Off The Hook by Beth Achenbach She smells of perfume and smoke,  her dangling hook has caught so many people that adore her. Today she is letting them loose  as she drives towards the blue and clouds. The rusty vision of that car,  her graying hair waving in the wind. The woman is escaping from this old city.  A place called home,  but now littered with waste and nature overgrown. Wildness spills out of it’s cracks  as clunky trucks carry their loads,  dead parts of the city  dumping at an unknown location  beyond the concrete barriers. Brick walls once brilliant with their reddish facades  now crumble to the touch. Windows boarded up  with warped plywood from the frequent rains  haven’t seen the light in years. The woman crosses over the city limits  trying not to be overcome with the heaviness  that she will never return. She deeply inhales the new air,  turns up the old car’s radio  and tosses h...

 

 

This is my life in a shoe… This past week  I have been walking around with a foreign object in my left shoe.  I know, I know, you are asking yourselves “why not take it out silly woman?”.  It's kind of like my life...somedays I feel the problem and other days it's gone and all seems good only for it to pop up again at the most awkward moments when I don't have time to stop and fix it!  But really you wonder if I must have some inherent need to pain myself unnecessarily?  I am a woman after all, we do have a tendency to put up with things rather than help ourselves!  The object could be my fear of being seen as something I’m not?  Or better yet, maybe I just feel like I deserve it for a bug I killed at some point in my life??  It could have to do with this lazy quality I have at times which means I don’t feel like making any effort whatsoever.  Maybe the object is simply me being lazy?!  Too much effort to remove a shoe dagnabit! ...

For Lovey Love from the outside EL-OH-VEE-EEE It's a smile, a touch and vows spoken over rings. Love from the inside is hearts, butterflies, fingers entwined bodies side by side through good and bad colds, headaches... I can breathe again! Love is standards... family get togethers, Sunday morning laziness, discussions over food, giggles in bed, "we are out of toilet paper, get some please." Love is figurative... humble pie, simmering spices, and whipped cream on top! Love is pins and needles, walking on eggshells, a balancing act... Two humans on a high wire attention to the center of the ring! A plunge into the net! Someone there to help you back to solid ground and cheers as you raise your hands in glory. Take a bow together, Teamwork! Victories and losses silence...laughter...strong words and much patience. Have a good day.  Tell me what's wrong! The complaint department is open, it...

My friends and I put on an art show once or twice a year in a car garage located in a long alleyway of garages that stretches the length of one full block, from Coles Street to Jersey Avenue in Jersey City.  It's not the ideal place for an art exhibit but over the last 10 plus years we have made it work.  The days of the exhibits we hang up signs on the side walls of the buildings at each end of the alley to direct people our way.  We have never had an issue so I was caught by surprise this past weekend when a man came walking towards us in a huff saying "no, no, what are you doing?" to which I replied "we are having an art show today".  Honestly my immediate response was to be irritated because we'd been doing this for years and then the man says angrily "you never take them down" which made me a little more irritated because I know we always take our signs down.  So I had just a few seconds to put thought into it and said in a calm sort of way...

This morning on my way to the train I was so very much in my head and became slightly annoyed because a couple was walking a bit too slow in front of me. See, it’s a NYC thing that I’ve unfortunately developed, walking fast and being unhappy when people are not walking at the same pace. We are all walking past a construction site and I make my move to go around them, then the woman lifts her arm, points and says loudly to her man friend “Look at the Hoe!” I thought it was amusing that she was excited by the site of a backhoe on a construction site so as I walked to their left I exclaimed “Who you calling a Ho?!” We all looked at one another and laughed a really good laugh. They were good sports, we had a moment, and I felt a tinge of guilt for faulting them for their slow walking. You never know how cool people really are until you give them a chance!

  This poem is dated September 3, 2015 in my journal and is about the making of lists.  I know, I know, it doesn't seem that exciting of a subject, does it?  It's one of those things in my life that is helpful but sometimes I wonder if it is just a waste of time?  Writing a list is easy enough but the hard part, for me, at least, is remembering I wrote the dang list or finding the list after I put it aside!  Thank goodness for the "notes" app on the iphone because I can make lists there when there is no paper!  I still tend towards the hand written lists and even though I've gotten better at putting them in places where they are easily found, some still fall into that void of doom where the single missing socks and earring backs disappear to...never to be seen again! Lists I make lists to try and remember  where my mind has been, lists to remember where my mind is suppose to go, and lists to remember that I wrote...

Straight jacket on, mad arms wrapped tightly. No wiggle room to express desperation. A balancing act for a stressed mind. Rivets made of plated metal hold a solitary position. Menace to self. High risk of failure. Added padding to emotional space. Eyes roll, muscle tension, a bellow forms at the heart, preparing for the lungs  to vent the pressure before blood boils. The scream halted at the throat, lump swallowed hard like the large pill of stress forced down dry. Life is crazy. A fine line sometimes between straight jacket and lucidity.

  This morning I check the weather app on my mobile to see what kind of jacket I should wear to work.  It's been a long, cold winter that has lasted well into April. One day it's sunny and warm then the next day you have to put your parka back on as the temperature drops 20 degrees, Ugh!  I'm hoping it's a warm weather day as the app opens and I see 50's and 60's.  I put on, what I call, my mid level jacket.  It's warm enough for some chill but light enough for fluctuating weather.  I leave the apartment and immediately feel hopeful as the sun warms my skin while shutting the apartment door behind me. I notice right away a lot of voices and look down the block to see a parade of teenagers, probably from the local high school. They must be doing some sort of mandatory drill this morning? The line of chattering young humans are walking parallel to me one block away so I increase my pace hoping I do not have to cross through their masses when I’m ready to tur...

Today I found myself feeling very much deflated as I was getting ready for work. There were multiple reasons why I was feeling that way and quite frankly I just wanted to stay home in bed!  As I was trying to finish up my morning routine before jumping in the shower I saw my stack of journals sitting on the shelf and decided to pick up one to just take a quick look inside.  I'm not sure why, maybe to wallow a little bit more or possibly to find a little inspiration?  With my writings it could go either way.  So I pick up the top journal, open it up,  and the place I land on is the page where I wrote a poem back in 2007 called "Deflated" !  I kid you not!  It's so weird how the wavelengths of the Universe line up sometimes!  Maybe someone else needs to read this today and not feel alone?  I'm with you friends, feel free to leave comments if you can relate.   Deflated I feel like a deflated balloon trying to float. No strings at...

A poem dedicated to our friend Donna Georgio who we lost way too soon on April 5, 2018.  My condolences to her family and friends near and far.  She was a rock star in my book and she will be missed terribly.  If anyone wants you can make a donation to the American Brain Tumor Association in her memory. Donna(middle) photo by Adrian Shepard Your Place In Our Hearts The air seems different now that you are gone. The current whispers your name and spreads the news of your soul’s departure. Time seems to click by slower, a slow motion drama that we are all unwilling participants in. Words don’t come as easily to speak of our loss but feelings of having known you stumble out easily bringing tears and a sense that things will never be the same. That is the way it is when a light goes out. We must stand still in the dark and wait for our eyes to adjust, for our hearts to reconcile, to comprehend reasoning that you ar...

Leggings by Beth Achen bach Leggings stretch, clinging to the skin. A pattern inches upward, the spandex succombs. Hips push outward forcing some breathing room. The waistband rides the curve, parks near the navel base. Skinny legged, magically expanding, human woman outerwear! Buy the thin facade! Charge now... pay later.

I generally do not make New Year's resolutions.  I look at it like this, I am already hard on myself 365 days a year!   I can choose to diet, save money, make art or spend more time  with people I love on any day or month I choose.  That said, I am not without a tradition friends.  What I like to do is write  a poem, usually, about looking forward with  a bit of hope to the new calendar year.  For 2017   I came up with a  blog post that expressed the sentiment I stated  above, which is that you don't only have the beginning of the calendar year  to make changes. You have the power, the ruby slippers, to make fabulousness  happen all the year long! That's 12 months, 365 days to make a change! So approaching 2018 at the end of this December I was thinking a lot about  what I might write but honestly,  I wasn't feeling much inspiration at all.  Not one bit! Quite frankly,  it had been quite ...

It's been overwhelming for me this past year dealing with chronic pain, turning 50, my favorite Uncle passing away, friends diagnosed with cancer, not seeing my family much, money problems and well....the crazy state of our country and world!!! LIfe my friends!  I mean, yes, I  know, in the scheme of world problems mine are not so awful.  It doesn't take away the fact that it's been a struggle for me.  So I made a pretty big decision to start learning more so I can practice Judaism. I've pretty much been a secular Jew my whole life.  We would go to my Grandparent's house when I was young to celebrate the Jewish Holidays but other than that I did not grow up knowing a lot about Judaism or having any kind of traditions instilled in me.  As a young adult I bought a Menorah and would light Hanukkah candles and that was it!  I think it was a way to feel connected to my grandparents who had both since passed away.  The thought has always been in th...

Observation of a couple on the train yesterday morning.  They caught my eye because of the way the woman was leaning into the man as they sat next to one another.  You know that lean when you are really comfortable with someone, be it a friend or a lover, that space sharing closeness that you enjoy without realizing it?!  One of the poles on the train that runs from the floor to the ceiling separated their legs but she was still able to lean against him in the seat as they passed a short purple Pringle’s can back and forth.  The two of them were enjoying the hell out of those chips as one would reach into the small cylinder, take out a short stack, and then hand it back to the other!  I thought it was sweet and then I started to think to myself "these people totally look stoned!"  Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not judging here!  I'm just relaying an observation that I caught with my eyes because it was way different than the average morning commute ...